What is a yoni massage?

Yoni in Sanskrit refers to the whole female reproductive organs. A yoni healing massage is a massage that focuses not only on the genitals, but on the energetic aspects of the entire body through the vagina and the vulva. Indeed, the vulva and the vagina contain energetic gates that can be used to stimulate or inhibit the main chakras, access traumas stored in the body or produce intense pleasure. One has to remember that the only sexual organ in the body is the brain, as pleasure can be achieved from any body part. 

Consent and boundaries – the foundation of trust

Before any bodywork session, there should be a discussion on the needs and boundaries of both the client and the practitioner. This is essential to build trust and to ensure that both work towards a common goal. Once the work has started, boundaries can be restricted but not expanded in order to avoid regrets afterwards. This means that if, for example, the client expresses that she does not want to be touched around the anus at the beginning of a session, the practitioner will not touch it even if the client changes her mind. This boundary can be removed at the beginning of next session if so desired, but this needs to be explicitly stated.

Boundaries regarding the practitioner are also important. If the practitioner states that he or she does not want to be touched by the client, this should be honored. 

Normally, a client who receives a yoni massage is fully naked, but she can also be covered to her level of comfort. The practitioner is often partly clothed, but practices vary and should be agreed upon before the session.

In modern healing yoni massage, there is no need to involve the practitioner's genitals. More specifically, it is not common practice to involve contact or penetration with the penis during a healing yoni massage.

Penetration can be done in sexual healing practices if it serves specific functions such as fighting a fear of penises, but is not common and absolutely needs to be discussed before the session begins. Any transgression of this rule constitutes sexual abuse in the eyes of the law in most countries.

Secrets to female pleasure – orgasmic spots and slow movements 

There are 8 pleasure areas in the vulva and the vagina, as illustrated in Figure 1. They are often referred to as tantric spots. Each spot offers different sensations and energetic effects for every woman as each of them is linked to a chakra. They also respond to different strokes and energetic stimulations. These gates are not always active for every woman, and yoni massage is the best way to activate them. In my experience, every woman can activate these spots. Once active, the experience of lovemaking and masturbation is enhanced.  

Because a yoni massage is mainly energetic, there is no specific goal in mind, but depending on the client's history and their current needs, we can focus on reaching different forms of orgasm, ejaculation (or squirting) for release, trauma release, energetic balance, stimulation, or relaxation. That being said, any of these may show up even if the focus was on another element. For example, even if pleasure is the focus, trauma may get released unexpectedly. This may involve releasing strong challenging emotions, which creates beautiful freedom from past blockages.

Typical steps in yoni healing massage

Some practitioners start the session with rituals to connect or dedicate the session, or with prayers. For me, it depends on the goal. If the goal is pleasure, I start by an energetic connection and silent dedication. If the goal is trauma release, I start with an in-depth discussion of the main traumas sustained and a series of Compassionate Inquiries.

Then the session begins with the client laying on a mattress on or near the ground, on the belly, side or back. The body massage may or may not be sensual, but is normally relaxing and uses long movements to bring the client into the body. There may be deeper massage in areas of high tension as it contributes to embodiment. Personally, I find that a stronger massage such as deep tissue or myofascial leads more easily to surrendering in clients.

As the practitioner approaches the vulva, the touch becomes more sensual and slow. Before touching the vulva, the practitioner should ask for permission to massage the vulva, and ask again later before entering the vagina, as the client may have changed her mind, in which case, the client has to instruct what she wants to do for the rest of the session. The massage of the vulva is often both sensual and therapeutic, releasing any tension or uncomfortable areas while preparing for penetration of the vagina with the finger. Slow speed is key to letting go and deeper pleasures in women.

When the client expresses her readiness, the practitioner can gently enter the vagina and caress it. Here, the practitioner will slowly explore all the areas. I tend to focus on pleasurable areas for a short period before doing any tension release, and then go back to the focus of the session; trauma, pleasure, energy balancing or relaxation. If pleasure is not the focus, care should be taken to not favour pleasure, and especially not working toward reaching orgasm or ejaculation. Although anal touch is common, few practitioners include rectal work. This is unfortunate because there is often a need for rectal work in trauma, and because rectal massage can lead to powerful pleasures if prepared properly (see my blog on anal massage for women).

A yoni massage lasts between 2 and 6 hours. Of course, the client can always stop the session at any point. Once the session is over, the practitioner may leave the client to rest alone for a few minutes. If the client expresses the need to debrief about the session, we do so, but normally, lengthy discussions should be avoided for a while to let the client integrate the work. 

Details about my practice

I normally recommend to have a gynecological session before we do a yoni healing massage, to reduce tensions to a minimum and to make sure there are no physical issues in the way of pleasure and relaxation. However, these can be combined.

Most sessions I offer are for women on their own, but clients may bring a partner to learn yoni healing massage or to contribute to the session if we agree to it previously. I normally ask to have a session in private to get to know the client and to understand the reasons behind the partner's participation; this can be integrated in a gynecological session. This is essential, because some clients may need to express parts of their history or needs that have not been shared with their partner. 

Please contact me for more info on training and on my sessions, or to book a session.