A lot of people come for a bodywork session because they feel stressed, not aligned, not present and not open to life. They are longing for more trust, energy, love, freedom and living life more fully. To be more connected to themselves.
After a good session mostly people tell me they feel more relaxed, more in there bodies, they feel more energy flowing, open and sensitive.
My intention with this blog is to inspire you to live from a place of connection and to find some tools to keep the state that you feel after a good bodywork session and to integrate that state into your daily life.
Of course living and working from this place of alignment is a day by day and longlife process and we stumble and fall… That is part of life:) It is so wonderfull to feel and know what you have to do. Sometimes you can get so afraid of it, but than you hold your ground and go for it anyway!
My tips and tricks to be more connected and aligned with the flow of life
1. Letting go of the past
Many people who come to me for yoga or bodywork are struggling with a feeling of being stuck and not living the life they are longing for.
Letting go of the past is essential, but is much easier said then done. If we look at it closer it is not so much about letting go of the past, but about letting go of the emotional attachment to the past. Resentment, disappointment, loss, or thinking it was better in the past, ...all of this is emotional charge which holds us back from moving forward.
Wisdom is said to be 'a memory without emotional charge', remembering and living who you really are. It gives you the chance to be completely ‘present’, acknowledging where you came from and stepping into the flow of life.
It is almost impossible to enjoy inner freedom and spaciousness if we have not transformed what gives contraction in our lives. The beauty is that tension, complains and problems are an invitation for you to connect and to waken up. Mostly people however run away, take painkillers not to feel the pain as a quick solution.
2. The power of being present
Presence is a magical alchemy. Just as an exciting experience or situation brings presence, being totally present makes an ordinary situation exciting.
Be with a sensation. Stay with your breathing. Breathing is always a “here and now” experience.
Let your awareness be a witness to the experience of this moment, without expecting something more to happen, without aniticipating what will happen next. Relax. Don’t look for anything. Presence is a key to leading a vibrant and alive existence.
3. Go with the flow
Life is like a flowing river and we either enjoy the ride, while being on that river, or we try to hold on to one place and see life flow by. What do you think brings you more joy and fulfillment?
If you want to ride that river you will have a much better chance when you accept what is and let go of how things should be. You go with the flow, sometimes under, most often above the surface, you move left, right, sometimes even jump or fall. Sooner or later you learn that trying to stay in control is just too much of a strain on your body and wellbeing. What is required most is your presence with the river, a flexible body and mind and the trust that your river, just like all rivers, is flowing to the sea.
4. Gratitude fuels the soul
More and more I realize that gratitiude is a strong antidote for painfull feelings and feeling as a victim of life. Of course when we are in a low mood, it can be easy to forget just how many amazing things our lives hold to be grateful for. But developing a daily practice of gratitude can be a lifesaver… it opens your heart, it reinforces the positive feelings and sets up a sort of loop of gratitude and happiness.
In the words of an anonymous speaker of wisdom, “When you smile about the life you live, you end up living a life worth smiling about.”
5. The healing power of nature
Spend time in nature. Take a walk, swim in the sea, sit under a tree. Feel the tree and its strong grounding force. Open up for the grandeur of nature and how it balances you.
6. The power of stillness and meditation
Coming into stillness and meditation is about dropping the cage around your soul. Sinking into your body, so the soul can fully incarnate into your body. This is what a good bodyworksession also can help you with… sinking into your body. But when you don’t have a bodyworker around you all the time;), you can keep this process going by the practice of becoming still. If the mind is restless, it expands and gets all over the place and the energy leaves the body. Better you practice to become still enough to feel direct connection to creation.
What can you do on your own to feel in the flow?
1. To practice presence:
Considering this, I invite you to explore the art of being present in your sexual life. Make a decision to focus for a short time on a particular aspect of lovemaking. For example, say you are enjoying the caress of your lover’s hand on your back. Allow yourself to focus completely on this sensation without any extra mental bagage. Another example could be to resist the temptation to go into the future when in the first moment you feel attraction for someone, when you feel that first tingling. Instead, enjoy the sensation for its own sake. Be with it fully and feel it in every cell of your body.
2. To let go and transform:
Here is a simple practice that will help to stay with a feeling, transform contraction that goes with it and connect to your body (paradoxally, the best moment to do that is when you face a challenge):
Close your eyes. Take a moment now to relax your body. Feel the emotion fully , feel where it is in your body. Don’t go into the story but instead relax into your core and inhale into the part of the body that feels most contracted. Slowly exhale and let go of the tension. Feel it desolve in your exhale and be released, little by little. Than inhale slowly and feel yourself filling up with light. Hold the breath effortlessly inside and feel as if the light is spreading in your body. As it enters your cells, it removes the contraction of the pain. Gradually you feel more space, more peace.
3. To practice stillness:
Find (a) daily moment(s) I which you can be quiet. Be fully in the now. Take the time to observe, to feel and be in direct experience. Relax your eyes, instead of looking for things outside of you. Keep your fysical body relaxed and open. With your consiousness, you scan the form of the body. Notice how your body is feeling, where there is tension, where there is lacking and where you feel pleasure. Connect the shape of your body with your consciousness and the breathing. Keep your attention into the core, into your belly...
Feel the magic of life and let it become part of you. Trust your intuition and insights and follow up from where you are right now.